In early 2025, I travelled through Sri Lanka with a group of great people. On the way home I stopped in Thailand to see a Swiss friend. He is married to a Thai woman. Through them I met a young woman of 18. She was staying with the couple for some days. I will call her S. That evening changed her life, probably also mine. In this post I tell you her story. I also want to warn you: please do not help the way I did. It can go terribly wrong.
A quick note: this post is not sponsored. I am not paid by iCare, I do not work for them, and I get nothing if you support them. I wrote this because I believe in what they do.
Meeting S. on her way to a new life
While talking to her, I found out pretty fast that she was stuck. She was studying in Isaan, in the north – east of Thailand. She wanted to become a teacher, but she failed. Her dad was chased by loan sharks, and her mum could also not help. So she had to earn money to have a chance to finish her studies. She had two years left, but her bank account was empty. You hear this kind of story quite often in Thailand. A story that might be true. Or might not.
However, her case shocked me. She was on her way to Pattaya to work as a “freelancer”, a word that often means sex work. She was young, just 18 years old, and had no idea what lay ahead in her life. And was clearly scared. She had like THB 300 left after she bought her bus ticket to Pattaya, where she wanted to earn some money. That was all she had.
That evening I looked at her. Speechless. There was not much I could do. I told her I would pay the bus ticket back, and if she went back home. She rejected my offer. So I went back home to Hong Kong.
One year later, during Songkran 2026, I remembered her. I was celebrating Wan Lai in Pattaya. Pattaya celebrates the water festival a few days longer the rest of Thailand, and it is probably the only time of the year when I find the city really livable. People are happy, celebrate. And compared to Bangkok, the streets are less crowded, so you can actually enjoy the festival.
I texted her and asked where she was at the moment. She was back in Isaan. After one week in Pattaya, she had given up. She could not sell her body. So she decided to take a loan to pay her tuition fees. A loan that started to destroy her life. Before the Songkran holidays, the school year ends, and she was in severe trouble. The loan sharks asked for their money and threatened to post her photo in a local Facebook group to shame her. She was scared, again. What happens if the university finds out? What if her student-friends find out that she was in Pattaya? She did not want people to know.
She was late with the school fee. Her teacher tried to help, but time ran out. In two days it would no longer be possible to enroll her. She was already deleted from the school system.
How I found iCare
Let’s jump back a few months. When I saw a video on YouTube. It was about the iCare Thailand Foundation (Thai: มูลนิธิไอแคร์ ประเทศไทย). I saw what Michael Andreassen, who runs iCare, and his team were doing for kids in rural Thailand. They built dormitories for students, so they could stay in the school to get an education. And they were able to support more than 60 students with a university scholarship. It was when I decided: I wanted to sponsor a scholarship for someone. So I saved 1/12 of the amount every month, to be able to support a student within one year. After that, I would contact iCare.
But why would I do that? Let me go back to the mid-1990s. I was going to school, and I to make a decision: get a job, or study. My mum and dad were very supportive and helped me whenever I needed it. But I also knew we did not have the money for me to study. Even though it is relatively cheap in Switzerland, we ran out of money. So the logical decision was simple: start an apprenticeship and learn a job.
Years later, I can say it turned out well. I loved my job, later earned a Swiss federal diploma in Marketing, became a product manager, and ended up in Hong Kong as Managing Director. There are many things I can be proud of. However, I was never great in school, so a scholarship was never an option. But, hey, I made my way! And I am lucky to be able to save some money and give someone who is less lucky a pathway to their future. So it was a relatively easy decision.
Is this story real?
But now I knew someone who needed help. The first thing I thought about? Is this a scam? Is it real? Does she really have no money? Did she really fail to enroll? Or is she asking because she is lazy?
So I called her professor, her Ajarn (อาจารย์). S was scared to give me all the details, but I made a video call with him anyway. After a while I knew: she is a good student, but she was four months behind with her payments, and they were about to kick her out of the school. One year before her graduation.
I talked to S and asked her how this could happen. She started to cry. She was helpless and had no idea how to solve it. She told me she would go to Pattaya again. She probably had no other option. She had tried to get a local job. In a restaurant she earned THB 200, part-time per day. Her debt was THB 30,000. So I tested her. I talked with her about her future, and about the jobs she could do instead of working in Pattaya’s sex industry. But with an income of THB 200 a day, it was clear that her dream of becoming a teacher was now far away.
I also knew she would not have a good chance to get a scholarship. She had made mistakes, and she had taken a loan. The new term started in a few days, and she was already deleted from the university system. I checked her identity with the help of local Thai friends. I checked her invoices and made a budget with her. All this for someone, I had met for around three hours in person.
The immediate solution is simple: give her the money, and she goes to school again. But that is not a real solution. I remembered what someone once told me: “Don’t bring someone a fish every day, so they have food on their table. Teach them how to fish, so they can take care of themselves.” That is true. Giving money is a short-term solution. Teaching someone how to earn money will help them in the future, too.
So I spoke to the professor again. He showed me all the open invoices. He gave me his word that he would enroll her the next day, but he needed the money. After checking on him and on the university, I made the decision: I take the money I had saved for iCare, and I support her. I will pay all the school invoices. She has to pay for her life and her food. She agreed. Let’s face it, she probably had no other choice than to say yes.
So I spoke to the professor again. He showed me all the open invoices. He gave me his word, he will enroll her the next day, but he needed the money. After checking on him, checking on the university I made the decision: I take the money, saved for iCare, and will support her. I will just pay all the school invoices, she has to pay her life, her food. She agreed. Let’s face it, she had probably no other chance than to say yes.
The real challenge starts after paying
Fast-forward to today, and S is studying. Every one or two days she sends me a photo. Of her with her students, of the work, or her lunch. It’s a simple life. She tells me what she is learning, and she has finished her internship. If all goes well, she graduates in April next year.
It was not an easy year. She got sick, she had problems with her teeth, and she lost her stepfather. Her mother got sick too. It was a crazy time. She was scared, she cried, she wanted to give up on everything – but whatever she did, she never asked me for money. She fought hard. She studied many hours and worked part-time in a restaurant. I coached her, I listened to her, and I gave advice on what to do if there was an issue. I kept her away from loan sharks. Or tried at least.
No, I don’t tell you this because I like to tell you how great I am. I tell you because I want to warn you. It is not easy to support a “child”. It is not done with giving money. It needs much more than that. S started to sell old clothes so she could earn money. She also worked in a restaurant. And still, at the end of the week, she ate just a rice soup because she had only THB 100 left. It was difficult to see. But I also knew I could not just send money all the time. It would probably never end.
Today, sometimes it feels like she is my younger sister. She is always there, needs support and help, but also sends me messages about her dreams and what she would love to do, but can’t at the moment. There are six months left, then she (hopefully) graduates. But already now, I know we had a small win: she never went back to Pattaya to sell herself to strangers.
What about the romance scam warning?
Yes, telling that story to someone, I heard that so many times. “It’s a romance scam, she is just lazy!” But you know what? I don’t care. Today I know who she is, where she lives, and how she lives. I spoke with the professor, and I talked to friends. At the beginning I checked on all that she told me. In detail. I never did catch her lying to me. And she works hard. After school she was heading to the restaurant to earn some money.
Yes she made a big mistake. She borrowed money for a huge interest rate. But we managed to pay back. However, I believe in her. I believe we can make her dream come true: being a teacher, having a future. But believe me, it is hard work. Very hard work.
Don’t do it my way!
That is why I have so much respect for Michael and the iCare team. Finding students who need money is one thing. Supporting them is another. I saw the videos of Chris Parker (YouTube channel “Retired Working For You“) about iCare, and through them I saw what Michael and his team did in the past years. It is incredible. It is something that deserves support.
I was lucky. S is honest. She even comes to me when she made a mistake, and she admits it. Most people will not do that. The warning about a romance scam is often real. S is not my girlfriend, she is far too young for that. No, she is more like my younger sister. We met, and I decided it was worth supporting her. Her school costs me less than a week in a hotel room in Switzerland. But the impact is definitely a lot higher.
But most people aren’t that lucky. They don’t check the stories in detail, and they don’t have local Thai friends to ask for help. They get asked for money, because they have it. The results are often not good. The receiver of the money relies on the supporter, and it ends in a disaster. That is the wrong way. That is why I am not sending money to her for her daily life. I teach her how she can earn it. Yes, I paid the school bill, so she has a bit of peace of mind.
If you like to support someone, then don’t do it like I did. I might most probably go wrong. Go to someone like iCare. You can see their impact in the video below. They have a track record, they are in Thailand, and they know what they do. They give young people a future. A future for them, and a future for their families. And that is what I will do, too.
I plan to sponsor another scholarship with iCare, once S has graduated. I have been lucky in my life. I had parents who were able to support me, and I got the chance to learn the job I do today. Today I have enough money to support my son, and still some left to give. But not everybody has this chance. Agree, you cannot help everyone. But you can help one person. Start there. You can change a life!
